Our Baby Graduated from High School

It Happened So Fast! I know we all say the same things. Where did the time go? It seems like it was only yesterday. For me, it was 36 years ago. North Salinas (CA) High School Vice Principal J. Wayne Kurlak was at the podium when I walked up to snatch my diploma. I reached out for the big handshake and he held back a moment, said "FINALLY," then shook my hand. I guess I was relatively well known around campus, maybe too familiar around the office.

For Bailey it's the beginning of what has to be a brighter future. The past 3 years have not exactly been easy on Bailey or the experience I wanted to provide to the "Ours," in the "Hers, Mine and Ours" menagerie Karen and I created with our marriage July 2nd, 1988. Karen brought to the marriage her daughter and son, then 7 and 6. My contribution was my son and daughter, 7 and 5 on the day of our wedding. On December 2nd, 1990, the "Ours" arrived to increase the population in our Fresno, CA home to 7. And on Thursday, June 18th, she joined 840 classmates graduating from El Camino Real High School.

In 2006 as we prepared for Clear Channel to sell the radio station I helped create, "Fabulous 570/690," there were opportunities to stay with the company. They all involved moving.

Again. From 1988 through the station's sale, we had moved from Fresno to Dallas to Nashville to Harrisburg (PA) to Boise. I worked in L.A. for over 2 years before we decided to bite the bullet and move Karen and Bailey from Boise to L.A. Actually, Clear Channel Radio President John Hogan practically insisted on the move. He didn't mind my commuting back and forth while I was traveling, doing project work for the Clear Channel corporate programming staff. But once I was officially reassigned to the L.A. radio stations, Mr. Hogan thought my family and I should be living in the same city. So despite the station being sold, Bailey's here. She has adjusted as well as can be expected to L.A. schools, has a lot of friends, and we're not moving her.

Enter MartiniInTheMorning.com. Even before committing to stay in L.A., a number of people in the industry had encouraged us to do something similar to the old radio station, but on the Internet, to keep alive the modernized version of the genre we had created. So who knew that a year into the life of this Radio-Internet hybrid, the U.S. would slide into a recession making it very difficult to find capital for a new business? OK, the truth is, no one, least of all me, knew much, if anything, about raising capital. Everyone that has been involved in this effort is good at what they do, and they are all passionate about the Martini Mission. In fact everyone involved from the beginning to today, started out as a listener, lovers of the music and the Lounge Lizard Lifestyle. But the fact is, none of us really knew how to ask people for a bundle of money, no matter how OBVIOUS the opportunity; the audience for what we're offering.

As parents, we want things to be better for our kids than they were for us. That's human nature. It's not that my brother, sisters and I had it that bad. I just wanted to do more for our kids. Radio has never been an easy business, and my experience would suggest a stubborn determination to succeed despite every sign suggesting I find a new line of work. It got so bad at one point that after losing a house in a fire, my kids and I spent a night with all the possessions we could haul out of the house, in our car. That was a real low point and I was determined to never let my family down like that ever again. We had a couple more low points. We were never homeless again, but it hasn't been easy. So we REALLY wanted Bailey's high school experience, especially her senior year, to be something REALLY special.

As it turns out, it was special. Despite our inability to make it materially special, this past weekend WAS special. It reminds me of my oldest son's pre-school graduation. His Mother (my ex-wife) moved just before his graduation. He was crushed. Just minutes before this special ceremony, my Dad, Sister and Niece all walked in the door. When my son saw them, you would've thought he was graduating from college with honors and a job paying a 6-figure salary. Same story this weekend. It was our oldest son, my Sister, Karen's Sister (affectionately known as 'Granny Psycho') and her daughter. I hope having close family here for Bailey's special day might have made up for some of the difficulties over the past year.

It's not just material stuff. When Mom and Dad are stressing over their businesses, struggling to make ends meet, everyone feels it. It affects everything. Despite it all, Bailey has been pretty amazing. Maybe she learned by watching some of the mistakes and struggles her older half-brothers and sisters lived through (and survived). And despite the fact that the "Haves" at her school (not to be confused with a strong contingent of "Have Nots"), were getting graduation presents ranging from new BMWs to vacations abroad, Bailey seemed content with a few cards, a little cash, and a scrapbook her Auntie Kay put together from pictures spanning from December 2nd, 1990 to the present.

I am in awe. Living through the last 3 years, the struggles, the deals that went wrong, the deals that never became deals, and the deals that aren't done yet (we're holding our breath), Karen and Bailey have been unbelievably strong. I thought things had been tough for the older kids...divorce, remarriage, step and ex struggles, moving here, moving there, new schools, new friends, leaving old friends behind...but as her childhood wound down, Bailey has turned into a pretty amazing young woman. Karen and I are so proud of her, and hope she lands a really good job because Mom and Dad might need to borrow some money. Kidding. Sorta.